Chocolate Log

I’ve mentioned that shout wipes are a must when packing-both in my purse and extras in my suitcase. I’m fairly clumsy to begin with. Add traveling to that which means you don’t always know when you will have a chance to wash your clothes and you get a mess-or at least I get a mess. I’m always impressed on TV shows were people get off planes and buses looking fabulous. I get off looking rumpled with as many bags under my eyes as I have checked at baggage claim.

On the flight to Italy when I studied abroad I was sitting away from the rest of the group and I was proud of myself for remaining calm with no one’s hand to squeeze for take off. I imagined I looked quite calm and relaxed. Then the food tray came around and when I popped the top off the yogurt it exploded all over me including my glasses. Just great-another 7+ hours to go in these clothes and I’m now covered in crusted strawberries.

But dried strawberries are nothing to the disaster I created on my clothing on the orchestra tour to South Africa. One night a bunch of us were hanging out in our hotel room. I was laying across one of the beds on my back, chatting for a few hours. When I got up, I found something nasty underneath me. It was chocolate. One of those little chocolate mints that nice hotels place on your pillow had become chocolate fondu under my lower back and rump. Yes, I know what it looked like. It looked like a mess. I feel sorry for the hotel cleaning staff when they found that the next day… Of course the story spread around the orchestra. Notably songs about my mess were created to the tune of “O Fortuna” which was one of the pieces we were playing. Even the orchestra conductor got in on the fun by getting someone to get me off the tour bus so he could stick a chocolate candy aptly named “chocolate log”  that he found at a rest stop on my seat.

Look before you sit.

That is one large whale.

A friend of mine from high school recently posted this picture from her trip to Japan. Not only is it a classic sign but it is aptly appropriate for me…who once was confused about what a tsunami was. It was either 7th or 8th grade English and we were all writing research papers. It was one of those classes where the teacher had the bright idea that we all exchange papers and do edits on the papers of our classmates. (Not only did we have to write a boring paper, now we had to read someone else’s) So I read this on kid’s entire paper on tsunami’s and when I got to the end I was skeptical to say the least. In the first sentence I had managed to read “A tsunami is a large whale” which offset the entire essay. I’m sure the kid wrote “wave” multiple times throughout the essay, but I kept reading whale. How could a whale get that far on shore? How could it cause people to drown? How could it get that high? I mean I knew whales grew to be big, and I knew sometimes they got beached, but this was ludicrous! Of course instead of rereading the paper I asked one of my friend’s how this was possible so the story got quite famous. As late as senior year kids from that English class would ask me what a tsunami was. As my friend pointed out on this picture-that could kind of look like a whale tail, right?

“All Aboard!”

I like to think I’m a fan of public transportation. It cuts down on traffic and it’s better for the environment. And yet every time I’m waiting for a train, bus or subway I’m always wishing I had a gas guzzling car, or even better a chauffeur. I’ve had late trains while French conductors took their coffee breaks. I’ve had smelly metros where arm pits were in my face in Rome. I’ve had metros so crowded in China I was too scared to get back on them. And I’ve had confusing bus rides in Germany where I’ve had to wait until the end of the day long trip to find out if I was on the correct bus. But this past weekend was the first time I saw a taxi masquerading as a train-and this was in Connecticut!

When looking on the train schedule online it had sporadic train times interspersed with certain train times stating “bus”. Why a bus would be running between train stops is beyond me. Not particularly convenient since they cannot take the direct route that a train would use. But the train I picked said it was actually going to be a train-or maybe a bus. But when we get to the station there was a sign that said  “the 4:00 train will be represented by a taxi”. ???? Clearly they didn’t expect it to be a crowded ride, but there were actually 3 of us. The driver did say that if there were more than four he would call another taxi. But I guess that would pretty much guarantee not getting there on time. And then I’m not sure how you would pick who went first. Rock paper scissors? I wasn’t in a particular hurry, though one of the women with me was trying to catch a connecting train. She immediately started quibbling with the taxi driver that he was two minutes late. He argued just one, she argued two. I’m guessing she doesn’t ride too many trains since 1 or 2 minutes late is pretty standard. Unfortunately we did hit traffic which there really isn’t any way around in a taxi…

He didn’t charge us for the ride, whether that was planned because the trip was a surprise taxi or because he thought connecting-train-lady would flip out again-I don’t know. But he moved too fast for me to even tip him.

My ride home was less eventful though equally free. The conductor asked if I needed to buy a ticket on the train, and when I said yes he said he would be back and never came back before my stop. So in conclusion, when it comes to public transportation expect the unexpected. Trains can be quite cheap if you don’t mind sometimes taking a taxi and waiting in traffic instead.

Pictionary 2

These signs were sent to me by my sister from Paris:

Rabbits use the subway too.

Run towards a white brick

stand with your hands on your hips!

Pictionary

My sister is currently in Paris and she just reminded me of one of my favorite things about navigating in foreign countries: their signs. We are so used to our own road signs and directional signs in buildings that it is surprising that other people have had different ideas of how to show people around. The following are some of my favorites, feel free to add your own interpretations of what these signs mean:

don’t feed the walrus

why did the penguin cross the road?

“no tromboning in the street”

don’t lean on a friend

don’t travel with giraffes

hard to see but it looks like another don’t drink and drive version

“dont play your flute into your phone”

“don’t drink and drive”

found on a wall in a school

“dig for burried treasure”

fans so strong they make men and women fly?

bathroom? that little girl has to pee I think